I sometimes wonder if the other teachers notice how many trips I take to the copier, or that I miss opportunities to monitor the hallway outside my door because I'm scrambling to get things ready for class, or that when they seek me out with questions after 9th hour, I look as warn out as if I'd been trying to juggle flaming chainsaws all day. But, I hope that if/when they do, they also remember their first few weeks and kind of understand.
Fact: Post-its, paperclips, and expandable folders changed my life.
As a hoarder in training with post-depression-esk views of conserving resources, I've always been rather anti Post-it. It seemed wasteful to write short notes on sticky paper one must pay for rather than scribbling words onto the backs of envelopes or other nearby papers. When in doubt, I just tried to remember everything. As it turns out, I can't remember everything. I forget which grades haven't been entered, which assignments are grouped together, and found myself spending far too much time trying to keep track of work sheets, reviews, quizzes, and tests. So, I'm a Post-it, paperclip, folder convert. My desks (I get to use two) are still frequently messy, but I haven't had the sinking "What did I do with that!??" feeling for at LEAST 5 days. For me, that's huge.
Fact: Variety is the spice of life, but routines make it livable.
I am not a morning person, so I've made the daily preparation process as fool proof as possible. I bake several weeks/months worth of individual meals ahead of time resulting in stacks of muffin tin meat loafs, 1 cup beef stews bowls, and frozen cups of shredded chicken topped with black beans. With my lunches set, my important morning steps go like this:
1. Put 1/4th cup of oatmeal and water in microwave and set timer to 2 min. Apply make-up and twist back hair while cooking.
2. Add to oatmeal Splenda, cinnamon, two spoons of apple sauce, and an ice cube (some days I sub a tablespoon of cocoa powder in for the apple sauce to make the day seem less scary).
3. While ice cube melts, wash yesterday's Tupperware, and add 4 carrots snapped in half. Remove portion of meat from fridge.
4. Eat, change, and "go confidently in the direction of your dreams"
Fact: I'm miles from polished at this career.
I'm so green I should be singing a duet with Kermit, but I'm gradually getting there. I'm building connections and despite nail biting moments when I pray no other staff member walks into the chaos that's filling my classroom, I'm making a difference.
I get to spend all day with so many unique and hilarious individuals. At an orchestra concert the other night, I found myself scanning the crowd of parents and realizing that they don't get to see their children like I do.
They don't get to see their son turn the other cheek to immature insults or watch their daughter build up a student with special needs. And, I'm not sure I can walk into school everyday remembering how much of my life was shaped by the moments, friendships, and decisions made in school. It's a lot to live up to. But, it's powerful and true... and now I get to watch and help. When you think about it, it's pretty cool. It's hard, and tiring, and one of the most rewarding jobs there is. And, I get to do it :)
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